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Saturday, Oct. 05, 2002-12:33 a.m.
"Denny's, Sad people, and Howling"
I'm REALLY confused today. I know my job very well, but everything is difficult right now, and I can't figure out how I am supposed to do my job, when everything is so strange! This morning, Pa took me for my walk, and fed me and returned me to my crate like every day... but Dad did not get up for HOURS. I was quiet and I played in my crate with my toys- but when Dad finally DID get up (and let me out! yay!) He didn't do anything like usual. He just wanted to lay on the couch, and watch TV... I tried to play gentle with him, and he just started crying, which confused me- so I laid down against the couch and snuggled him... but it didn't help. I don't understand why. Dad kept going back to bed. He came out and ate, and snuggled, then put me up and went back to bed... he did that ALL DAY LONG... I didn't know what to think!! Finally, he got my leash and things and we went outside! I was very fierce about keeping scary people away from him without even LOOKING scary myself! I didn't growl or anything. But I kept my body between Dad and anyone scary! (It's strange... I know he asked me to do that... and he praised me and petted me and gave me treats... but he didn't get happy like usual.) I was so very good, when we went to see Pa at work, and we all went to the drugstore together. Dad got his stuff (ew, pills!) and we shopped a little, and LOTS of people stopped to talk about me or ask to pet me and stuff. I was so cute and nice... but Dad didn't QUITE get happy, even tho it made him smile. We went to dinner at a Denny's... I got under the table JUST like I was supposed to. I told Dad went to get up and take care of his ostomy bag, and I even made sure not to BEG... okay, maybe I made the big-brown-eyes just a FEW times... but I didn't beg! :) When we were done, Dad snuck me a few bites, because I was SO hungry!! I wagged my tail, and was glad- but then the lady who served us came and TOOK AWAY the plates!! I sat upright, my ears went UP and I BARKED! (That was dog for, 'oh no! that still has food on it! give it back!!') Dad DIED.... Pa too... people looked at me and said they didn't know I was there before that, and why did I bark? I only barked once... but I have a loud voice. We left, and Pa gave the lady some green stuff and apologized that I barked. She laughed and laughed and said no, I was welcome to come back ANY time! They thought I was very very well behaved, and that they didn't blame me one BIT for barking when the food went away! Dad was a little bit cheered by that, I think, because he felt horrible that I made a BIG mistake... I am glad he's not mad or anything, he was just embarassed!! We went home, but Dad is still not himself... I am very worried. I have been snuggling him, but it's not fixing everything like it should. I even try to play gently... but nuffin works! I'm starting to get sad too. A little while ago, I scared everyone to death, because I was being so quiet asleep in my crate.... and then this ghostly, SAD moan started, and grew into a HOWL.... I sounded like a cemetary hound, Dad said... it upset him a little, because when he came in and asked if *I* did that, he looked rattled! ...and I just gave him my saddest face. I think Dad is going to come spend some special quiet time with me now- He wants to go and see a movie with Pa tomorrow, and I know he is worried about how quiet I will be. (I will try hard not to bark!) ...it's a scary movie, and Pa thinks if Dad gets scared, I might try to protect him!! (and I would too, if I understood what was scaring him! Just like I would make it better if I knew what was making him sad too!!) I will make sure to tell everyone how my first movie went... I hope it is fun- Dad says they have POPCORN there... and Pa said 'ya. all over the floor too!' so I am imagining a carpet of popcorn all for me...
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