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Friday, Jun. 06, 2003-11:02 a.m.
"Access Issues in Seattle"
Dad Speaks ...
'Dad' speaks out about access issues! Hey everyone- I know I don't usually 'interject' here, and today I wanted to make an entry for Axel so badly! (We went to the beach for the first time this morning, and had lots of fun and little adventures!) Unfortunately, another very bad experience happened, and I feel the need to vent a tiny bit about it- maybe one of my regular readers will contact the businesses involved, or otherwise help spread the word... this issue has become so severe for me, I am seriously thinking about giving up Axel- I cannot leave the house lately without more hassles anyway... what good does getting your freedom back with a Service Dog do you, if society yanks it away again by agressing you at every turn? I haven't been having an easy time of /life/ right now, so to have this kind of thing happen... I just am not strong enough to fight it anymore. It's put me into a real spin. A few days ago, we went to Best Buy to purchase a 19" computer monitor... "my" computer is finally running again, where I work on my art and play games- and the old monitor is dead...(read: I was ready to shell out for a NICE monitor- my old one was a professional graphic-art quality avitron true-flat...) I always buy things like that at Best Buy, because we didn't have a car untill recently, so it was the only way to get BIG items safely home- the Best Buy is only a block or so from my home. :) I bought all kinds of things there- I am a VERY good customer. (grin) The air conditioner, vacume, computer peripherals, even my digital camera... over the years it has been there, I have really bought a lot of stuff- and they see me go in pretty often, so much so that when I went in the other day, the guy at the door greeted us with "Hey Guys- how're you two today?" and not 'welcome to best buy'... An employee came up to me and told me they didn't allow pets, and I told him Axel was a Service Dog... and he said no problem. (That's a common event- especially since Axel was wearing his backpacks which do not have patches on them yet. His cape is more clearly marked.) But then the store manager came CHASING us down (Axel took a dive to the floor, she came so fast/hard... she spoke SO loud I was genuinely humiliated beyond belief... she asked for ID (which is AGAINST THE LAW!) and began grilling me over what Axel does for me, what my health issues were, etc... for those who know, the vast majority of my disabling health issues revolve around parts of the anatomy that you just don't WANT to discuss in public- there is no polite way to explain these issues without using intimate language that is HUMILIATING to have so many people hear- and LOTS of people had stopped to watch and listen. I just wanted to die... She grilled me, grilled my ID (even asked to see it a SECOND time!!) and then announced how the law DID allow her to do this (it does not. You can visit the Department of Justice website at http://www.usdoj.gov/crt/ada/animal.htm to read for yourself!) and that she "trains guide dogs"...and so knows that there "may be" other types of service dogs- she kept using the phrase "REAL Service Dogs" when commenting or asking questions, and it was really shaking me up bigtime... I started shaking and everything- I have some serious Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder going on, and this was bringing on some serious anxiety at this point, you know? I'm usually really level on the outside even when I am upset, but I started sweating and shaking by the time she was done with me- I got so physically nauseous/sick that I ended up leaving the store right then, so go home and spend several hours either perched on the porcelin throne, or heaving my guts up over it (two exits no waiting!).... you see what I mean about humiliation? To go from 'yay! I get a new monitor!' to... that. I of course got dehydrated from the mass-exodus of everything in my system, and ended up sick in bed for about 12 hours... yeah, I wigged inside- normally, something 'upsetting' can't cause that, but it was VERY hot, and we'd already been outside and walking quite a bit already. You know, I can take responsibility for /being/ disabled... but when did America become nazi-germany-like, so that they force you to IDENTIFY yourself with markings, and just DEMAND papers that prove those things, and then go over them with a fine-toothed comb while agressing you in public the whole time?? She kept 'informing' me that Best Buy had just instituted this "new policy" that "doesn't allow dogs in the store" and was essentially saying that included all Service Dogs unless they decided otherwise, based on the proof they "required". (She said you would have to have a cape with clear markings "from the school" as well as ID from them and kept implying or asking outright for "other paperwork".... I was so close to just having a little mini-breakdown on the spot, you know? The worst part is, this is happening more and more often... it hadn't been a problem (certainly not in places I frequent! geeze, most of those folks know Axel by NAME!) but that day I hadn't brought all the legal crud I usually carry in case of that kind of problem- I have a 'real' ID card (issued by the service dog organization itself) and a "law card" that states the laws, as well as a printout of the WHOLE set of laws- and a little brochure provided by the Delta Society (which is HEADQUARTERD up here for crying out loud!!!) to help businesses understand when they can and when they cannot deny access, and how much info/id they can ask for... I didn't have any of it- I just didn't REMEMBER to replace it when I washed his cape and bags! That's one reason the law FORBIDS demanding it. :( I shouldn't have had to reveal my personal medical history to someone, much less to a whole STORE of people... I was really upset. (okay, I admit, I went home and bawled like a little girl. I am STILL humiliated over that part. I'll never be able to go in there again, and I am seriously thinking about just giving up Axel to someone who isn't going to be attacked over him so much- someone with a more obvious disability, maybe, or who won't need to go out with him in public where that happens.) I can't stand that this happened... then today, I got a repeat (albiet a much less humiliating/embarassing one) at a little thrift store here called 'Value Village'. The lady approached us and repeatedly tried to talk me into taking him out, and not bringing him in anymore... I was able to /talk/ to her- and she didn't ask any /personal/ questions- but she kept telling me these horror stories about how 'yesterday' a rottweiler was brought in and bit someone- and she said things like "it WAS a Rottweiler" like she meant 'and so is yours so...' ...and I was so frustrated. I was trying to help her understand their rights (stores DO have them! the ADA is NOT one-sided!!!) and she said they called the police but were told it wasn't a police matter and then called 911 and were told it wasn't an emergency (I have trouble beliving that second thing even happened, but I didn't say so to her- who knows, maybe a jerk was on the other end of 911 that day.) ...but she claimed the store had to drive the person to the emergency room- and yadda yadda... I dunno. She kept nodding and seeming to understand that a Service Dog is different... but then off she'd go again. She kept asking me things like to "make sure he's RIGHT with you" but then said the dog who bit was on a leash too- and Axel's leash is tweleve INCHES long where the handle to hold it is! Gimmie a break!!! I don't know... I just feel so trapped anymore. I know part of it is his breed- but the other part is that I now LOOK healthier than I did before. I don't LOOK disabled. There's also a lot of folks buying 'personal protection dogs' to 'treat' or 'mitigate' PTSD, (which in my *purely personal* opinion is not a good thing)... and a widening movement for using Service Dogs to treat or mitigate purely psychological disorders (like bi-polar, etc)... (which I have mixed feelings about, but... it's a hard call)... but it's CRUSHING the people 'in the middle'. People whose dogs are trained to mitigate things like Seizure disorders, Autism (especially in children), deafness or semi-deafness/semi-blindness... or even people like me, who were lucky enough to get a dog that was 'cross trained' to mitigate more than one serious disorder... I hadn't left my own home without James or someone else *with* me, in several YEARS before Axel... he gave me back my freedom, but now, suddenly, is it worth it? All other life-crises aside (and believe me, there's plenty!), the feeling I will be confronted like that in public by someone... it's hard enough to manage being sick AND to have PTSD to the degree I do, but to feel like at any moment someone is going to rush out at you, and start yelling... demanding... etc... I'm just not prepared to handle that right now. I can't. Now sure, in my wildest dreams, hordes of people would decend apon Best Buy, attack them for this outright ILLEGAL policy of flat out ignoring the Federal LAW regarding service animals... and then Best Buy would jump right to it and do something unbelievably SPIFFY, like Oh, buy Axel a gift certificate to a pet store, or HELL, just GIVE me the damn monitor I tried to go in there and BUY!! -even the best monitor they HAVE would be cheaper than the lawyer to START the legal actions they'd need if I sued them... But the rest of me, the logical part... then *that* part kicks in, and notes: 1) there are no HORDES of people to do this. (smirk) 2) Best Buy wouldn't give me SQUAT, because that would be admitting they were WRONG. 3) they would PREFER to pay the lawyer, for reasons no one other than the bigfatcorporations seem to understand... and 4) the latest challenges to the ADA and Access in the courts have gone HORRIBLY awry, turning into vicious attacks on the person using the dog, instead of what it SHOULD be- which is a clear cut case of 'what does the law say', vs 'what did the store management DO'... UGH. I wish I had one of those magic fairy godmothers, y'know? I'd send her after these people and she could duct tape them to as chair and read them the law untill they GOT it... In my opinion, there'd be NO problems with discrimination if people just followed the commonsense rule of "don't be a dick." :P Anyhow... I'm still feeling like heck both emotionally and physically (I hate the heat, my body just can't take it anymore!) and I know that it would be hoping for too much, to think anything good would come of all this... maybe in a few hours, or a few days, I can come post for Axel again- I know you all would love to read about his fun experiences at the beach. He'd never been to the beach before, and there was abundant wildlife and new experiences for him to see and have to try and puzzle out... it was fun for us both. I'm sorry everything crashed in and got between that and my ability to write today. :/ My Apologies. For the 'scoop' on the law, the link again is: http://www.usdoj.gov/crt/ada/animal.htm Hugs, and big sloppy Axel-kisses to everyone who read through all that- (tho now he says we need a popcicle break, and i'm inclined to agree... *slurp*)
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